All that Glitters is not Golden
Dad, it's supposed to be your "golden years"
a time to sit back and relax
When work is done and you travel to Florida
to play shuffleboard and get some sun.
The "golden years" are anything but
what some suggest they are
When Alzheimers has taken away
your ability to travel far.
Your world now consumed by paperwork
from years and years ago
You've read them to me so many times
I think each word I know
Your anger at us frightens us, I know you don't understand
Most days I feel like a tightly wound up rubberband
I'm sorry you lost your license and ability to drive
It was a hard decision made by your doctor, Dan and I
But we worried about your safety and the others on the road
We are trying our best to get you to places you have to go.
We have so many decisions to make concerning care for you
So overwhelmed with what is going to be the best to do
When you call me 30 times a day most times to rant and rage
Sometimes I have to take the phone off the hook because it causes me such pain
And then you leave a message calling out my name
And I pick up the phone to listen and talk because guilt has overcame.
I can't imagine your fear when paranoia sets in
When you see and hear things that are not there
The constant searching for items you think were taken but really have been lost
because the loss of brain cells is taking its cost
on my Dad.
And all that glitters now are my tears.
Pamela LaBrake |
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